Can the chunni and kurmai be held on the same day?

Question:

My daughter is getting engaged and we will be having the engagement at their home in the back yard with tents, as their house is big and the groom said it would be okay.  Can the chunni and kurmai be held in their house the same day or do each sides have to come to each other’s homes to do this?

 Sukhyji,

In addition to being engagement ceremonies, the kurmai and chunni are both considered sagan ceremonies, which means they bestow good luck and blessings on the bride and groom.  The kurmai is a ceremony for the groom done by the bride’s family and the chunni is a ceremony for the bride done by the groom’s family.

Combining the chunni and kurmai ceremonies together is what I have suggested in my website. Usually when the ceremonies are combined the costs are shared by both families but in your case the groom would be hosting. This is perfectly fine although you might wish to offer to share in catering costs etc. Please note, if you feel that this will offend the grooms family, it’s best not to offer. If you feel that you want more freedom in terms of who you would like to invite, then you may suggest it be held in a banquet hall. Both families should feel comfortable to invite whomever they wish and that is why I  suggest a neutral location.  In this way it becomes everyone’s party and not just the groom’s side.

Combining the sagan cermonies  allows both the bride and groom to be present and involved. Also, as an added bit of fun and a bit of western flare, the groom can get down on one knee in front of all family and friends and present a ring to the bride. 

 

Aapke,

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